MY SWEET ROSE
How sweet and pure thy perfume grows,
As sweet as seasoned showers to the ground
Upon which thy gracious beauty glows,
I swear my love for ever to thee bound.
Ah, my sweetest rose! I long and pine
For cosy softness of thy velvet shine.
Come, do not tarry! Make haste ere Time’s quick pace
Hath ploughed the furrow through my flesh and bones.
Why did thou forsake me? Thou needed space?
For thou did love me, that too, the Almighty knows.
But when I sleep, our two hearts meet in dreams,
My groaning melancholy gone in thy embrace.
All days as nights do seem to me
Until the day my eyes see thee.
© irina dimitric 2013
The first version of this poem was written in 2011 for Wednesday Writing Essential prompt at gather.com:
‘Write a response without any verbs of being and at least one allusion to Shakespeare.’ We were allowed to borrow a line from Shakespeare. Line Two in this poem is borrowed from one of his sonnets; I might still, one day, find which one! Or, perhaps you could find it for me. 🙂 However, I did find the sonnet which provided the idea for my final couplet: it is Sonnet 43.
I started revising the poem three days ago, polishing the metre and rhyme. It was Aquileana’s brilliant post on John Keats http://aquileana.wordpress.com/ that renewed my interest in the sonnet. When I looked up Sonnet on Google, I realised my original version was only a sonnet-like poem: it consisted of three quatrains and a couplet, but the rhyme in the second half of the second quatrain had to be altered and consequently adjusted in the third quatrain; and I paid more attention to metre. Although the language is archaic in some lines, I can call it a Modern Sonnet owing to its peculiar rhyming scheme:
a b a b c c d a d a a d e e.
This is my very first and only sonnet. I hope you like it. ~ Have a nice weekend! ~ Irina 🙂
© irina dimitric 2013
beautiful sonnet! Happy weekend and write more poems x
Thank you so much, nice lady. Thanks for your encouragement. 🙂 Cheers, Irina
Thank you so much, Mockingbird. 🙂
This is stunning, Irina! And I love the photo, too! 🙂 I adore the line, “for when I sleep, our two hearts meet in dreams.” Just lovely!!
Caroline, I’m so glad you like it. I used Picasa 3 to make the background soft. Thanks for your lovely comment. 🙂
●●● ★► IRINA ◄★ ●●●
Beautifully written, so sweet and heart directed. Your words get deep into my heart. Congratulations…
Thanks a lot for the mention. Hope you don´t mind i think I will be updating Keats´s post in order to mention your gorgeous sonnet too… (Fair treatment right?. Hope you don´t mind I will link you to this post!!!).
And well regarding Shakespeare´s sonnets I love them all and I like to read their analysis at sparknotes and so on…
Sonnet 43 is beautiful. (All days are nights to see till I see thee, And nights bright days when dreams do show thee me).
I still keep in mind sonnet 116 by Shakespeare. As it is related to Keats´s “Bright Star” probably I will be posting it. (Or other Shakespeare´s sonnet). But I am sure my next post will be a sonnet by Shakespeare. I will let you now.
Many Hugs and happy weekend for you. See you at twitter,
Dear Aquileana, I am delighted you like my sonnet. How could I not mention you since your post was the inspiration for this sonnet? I worked on my old poem for three days and am quite pleased with the result, even more pleased that it pleases you. I can’t thank you enough for your wonderful work on your blog.
And I’m humbled and honoured you want to include my sonnet in Keats’s post! I’m most excited about it and I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Looking forward to your next post about a Shakespeare’s sonnet.
Thank you so much for the tweet too. Hugs 🙂 Irina
I’ve just seen my sonnet at the end of your post!!! 🙂 I’m overwhelmed to be in such illustrious company!!! 🙂 Oh, it looks so beautiful! Thank you sooooo much! It’s midnight here, I’ll have to take a sleeping pill, I’m so excited.
Have a great week! Hugs xxx 🙂 Irina
Pingback: John Keats: “Bright Star” (Sonnet) / “Estrella Brillante” (Soneto).- | La Audacia de Aquiles
It was so worth you going back to then bring us this glorious poem. The language is so enchanting and suitable to the subject.
Thanks, Benita. Yes, it was worth it and I enjoyed the process.
Soft, melancholic and beautiful. The photograph is superb … keep on doing good job, Irina.
Thank you, Branka. I’m so glad you like it.
How simply beautiful Irina! What must I look at: the rose or your poetry? That was a joy:-)
Thank you, Rexie, for stopping by. I appreciate your lovely comment.
You know what… as I started reading the poem, I thought “This sounds similar to Shakespeare.” And THEN I read the text below it! Genius. Beauty.
Thanks, Christy. I’m so glad you like it.
Pingback: Sonnet: (template) ((More “Etudes” comming))… | David Emeron: Sonnets
Pingback: Regarding “Etudes” 11 and 12: | David Emeron: Sonnets
Oh, this is a beautiful piece of writing, congratulation….very fine!
Thank you so much. I appreciate your encouragement.